Fic: All That Matters, Kara/Karl, PG, AU, vague mentions of Kara's child abuse

[lanalucy]

Part of my ongoing Home Is Where the Heart Is series.

Also on AO3.

Thanks to newnumbertwo for the beta!

Kara pulled her shoulders back and knocked on the door. Part of her hoped that Antonia wouldn’t be home, but when she opened the door and smiled at Kara, a bigger part of her relaxed.

“Kara! I was on my way out the door. What’s up?”

“Oh. If you’re on your way somewhere, this can wait.” She shifted on her feet, suddenly uncomfortable.

Antonia squinted her eyes and examined Kara, then backed up. “Nope. I was going to have lunch with a friend before my shift. This is more important. Let me just call her and let her know I need to reschedule.”

“You don’t have to do that. It’s not that important.”

Antonia pulled her into a hug. “Kara, you showed up at my house on a weekday, when you knew no one else would be here. It’s important. I’ll make the phone call and we’ll talk. Get us some tea.”

Kara shuffled to the kitchen, still unsure what she was doing here. She got iced tea ready for both of them and got to the dining room table just as Antonia did.

“Okay, honey, what is it?”

“Um...obviously, you already know I’m pregnant.”

“Of course. And you’ve told Karl, and we’ve told his sisters. We’re all very happy about it, Kara.”

“I am too, I guess. Never really thought about being a mom. I didn’t…” She trailed off.

“I know. Your mother was a terrible parent, Kara. You don’t have to be.”

Kara shook her head. “It’s not that. I may not be the greatest mom, but Karl will be a good dad, and you and the girls will help, so I won’t mess ‘em up too bad. It’s not that.” She played in the condensation on the glass. “Karl wants to marry me.”

“You don’t want to marry him?”

Kara would forever love Karl’s mom for that, if nothing else. There was no judgement in her voice when she asked the question. She shook her head again. “I don’t know if I’m good enough.” Antonia stayed silent, clearly understanding that Kara wasn’t finished. “I mean, you’re gonna be stuck with me forever now, because Karl and I are having a baby. But if I don’t marry him, he has a chance to marry someone else. Someone better.”

Antonia set the glass down, hard enough to startle Kara. “Kara Thrace! You have been a part of my family for nearly ten years. You trusted him with some of the most important parts of your life, and you trusted us to keep you together when your mother flaked. You are a part of my family, one of my kids, whether or not you marry Karl.” Antonia sounded almost angry.

“I -”

“You love him.”

“Of course. I always have. He’s always been my best friend.” Her first sight of Karl across the school track when they were twelve flitted across her mind, then dissipated with Antonia’s next words.

“Do you want to be with anyone else? Want to date to see if he’s the one you want?”

Kara was horrified by the suggestion. “No! Frak no! There’s nobody else like Karl.”

Antonia smiled. “There certainly isn’t. My boy’s special. If you want to marry him, you will. If you don’t want to, you won’t.”

“You won’t be mad if I don’t marry him?”

“Oh, honey. I might. But it’s not my choice to make. If you’re still together in twenty years, will I wonder why you never married him? Sure, maybe I will. Will I wonder if you love him? Not even a little.” Antonia pushed her chair back and held her hand out to Kara. “Come here.”

Kara came around the table, and Antonia pulled her into her lap. She held Kara close, petting her hair. “You are my daughter, Kara, as much my daughter as if I’d had you myself. You couldn’t make us let go of you if you tried.”

Kara tried not to cry, but the tears started and she couldn’t stop them, and she gave up trying. She stayed in Antonia’s lap, being held by a mother for the first time she could remember. When her tears slowed down, Antonia pulled a handkerchief out of her pocket and wiped Kara’s face, then handed it to her to blow her nose.

“Better now?” Kara nodded. “Figured it out, you think?” Kara nodded again. “Good.”

Antonia didn’t ask what she’d decided, and they spent a few more minutes talking about what Antonia remembered from being pregnant herself.

“I have to get to work, Kara. You’ll be okay?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna marry him, you know.”

“I’m glad. It’ll make Karl happy.”

“I think it’ll make me happy, too.”

“That’s all that matters.”