Fic: Orange Is a Terrible Color, Kara/Zak, Kara/Lee, PG-13, pre-mini AU, warnings for angst (?) 1/2

[lanalucy]

Zak invites Lee for lunch and his whole life changes.

Many thanks to newnumbertwo for the beta!

Lee leaned forward as the waitress left the table, “So?  What did you ask me here for?”

“To get your opinion on something.”

“Orange is a terrible color on you.”

“Frak off, Lee.  No.  I’m…” Zak looked away, then back at Lee.  “I’m thinking about asking Kara to marry me.”

“Oh.”

“Wow.  Such excitement.”

“I love Kara, Zak.”

“I know.  I’m so glad the two of you get along so well.”

It was Lee’s turn to look away and look back.  He sat back in his seat, playing with the condensation on his glass.  “No, Zak.  I mean, I love her.  I’m in love with her.”

Zak leaned back, his face a puzzle.  Then, “Does she know?”

Lee nodded.  “She can’t possibly not know.”

“She’s never said anything.  Hells, Lee, you’ve never said anything.”

“I wouldn’t ever have.  But…”

“But what?”

“I need you to understand now.  If you ask her, if she says yes, I can’t stand up with you.  You can’t ask me to stand there at the temple with you and watch the woman I love marry someone else.”  He took a long drink from his glass, swallowing several times.  “I won’t stop you.  I won’t ever say anything to her.  But I can’t watch it happen.”

Zak just sat there, staring at Lee as if he’d grown an extra head.  After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, he asked, “How long have you felt this way?”

Lee shook his head, his mouth turned down in a frown.  “Since the night I met her.  She’s so…”

Zak nodded, smiling wryly.  “Yeah.  She is.  What are you going to do about it?”

Lee looked up.  “Do?  Zak, I’m not going to do anything.  I told you, I’m not going to say anything, not going to stop you marrying her.  I want her to be happy, and if that’s with you, that’s what I want for her.”  He sighed heavily.  “I’ll probably put in for some extended tours on battlestars, or get into Fleet Law School, so I don’t have to be here.”

“What if she’d be happier with you?”

Panic swept across Lee’s face.  “Zak, no.  You can’t...that’s not why I told you.  No.”

“You said she knows how you feel.  She loves me, I know she does, but what if she’s with me because I’ve gone after her and you haven’t?”

“No,” Lee repeated stubbornly.  “I’m not going to hurt you that way.”

“Lee.  You think it doesn’t hurt to know that you’ve been in love with my girl for six months and I’m just now finding out?  To know that she knows you’re in love with her and she’s never told me, either?  To know that if I marry her, my brother won’t be there because he wants what I have, and maybe she wants it, too and is just afraid to hurt me?”  He smacked the table.  “Gods!  Why hasn’t she ever said anything?”

“What is she supposed to say, Zak?  It’s okay.  My tour is almost up.  I’m due to go back out on the Atlantia for a year, and I may put in for something more permanent.  I won’t be here to get in the way.”

“I can’t ask her without knowing how she feels about you.  You can’t really expect me to.”

“That’s exactly what I expect, Zak!  Ask Kara to marry you.  She loves you, so be happy with her.”

The waitress walked up with their orders, and they both dug in, purposely keeping their mouths full so they couldn’t talk.  When they finished eating, they stacked their plates and shifted nervously.  Finally, Zak shook his head and said, “This is not the lunch with my brother I was expecting.”

“Sorry.”

A little bit of anger slipped out.  “You know, Lee, you should be.  If you fell for her the night you met her, the night I passed out on the couch drunk, you should have said something then, told me how you felt.”

“It was a complete surprise to me.  How was I supposed to know that I’d still feel this way six months later, Zak?  How would it have helped for you to know then?”

“I wasn’t that serious about her then.  If I’d known, maybe I could have, I don’t know, talked to her.  Let the two of you date or something.”

“Too late for that now.”

“It doesn’t have to be too late.  That’s my whole point, Lee!  Gods.  I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you have to talk to Kara and tell her how you feel.  Let her decide.  If she chooses me, or she chooses you, then we’ll both know for sure.  If she tells both of us to take a hike, well, I guess we’ll still know for sure.”

“No, Zak.  I won’t do it.”

Zak’s mouth tightened into a thin line.  “If you don’t, I will.  I have to know how she feels.  I can’t marry her and always in the back of my mind wonder if she loves me the way I love her, or if she’s thinking about my brother.”

===

Zak was deliberately casual.  “Saw Lee for lunch today.”

“Yeah?  How is he?  He hasn’t been by in almost a month.”

“He said he’s been staying away on purpose.”  Zak leaned against the door jamb and watched her carefully.

She barely turned her head over the shoulder.  “Oh?  Has he gotten a girlfriend or something?”

“No.  He’s been staying away because of you.”

She froze, then started washing dishes again.  “Because of me?  Did I do something to offend him?  He should have said something.”

Without the lunch conversation in his head, he probably would have taken that at face value, but he couldn’t.  “Kara.  Stop.  Look at me.”

“I’ve got to get these dishes done, Zak.”

He walked over and put his hands on her arms, then slid his hands down to loosen hers from the plate.  “Turn around, Kara.”  He watched her hunch her shoulders up, then turn to face him.

“What did I do, Zak?”

“It’s not something you did, exactly.”  He watched her face, but it betrayed nothing.  “He says you know why he hasn’t been coming by.”

She shrugged her shoulder and said, “Why would I know what’s going on with him?  It’s not like we talk to each other when you’re not around.”  She didn’t quite meet his eyes.

He stepped back, his hands falling to grip hers lightly.  “Kara, how did things go between you and Lee the night you met?”  He watched color rise in her cheeks. Lee didn’t tell me anything happened, just that he’d fallen for her.  All the more reason to get this figured out. “Did you get along okay once I passed out?”

She grinned crookedly up at him.  “We drank a lot more.  Finished off the rest of the wine, went on to shots of ambrosia.  We were both drunk, so yeah, we got along fine.”

“I never could hold my liquor as well as Lee could.  Something the two of you have in common.”

She laughed.  “You are quite a lightweight for your size, Zak Adama.”

Oh, frak this talking around it! “Do you love Lee, Kara?”

“Of course, Zak.  He’s your brother.”

“That’s not what I’m asking.  He’s in love with you.  Are you in love with him?”

Kara stood there, mouth hanging open, unable to answer, which was something of an answer in itself.

He pulled her into his chest, put his arms around her.  “This would have been a lot easier if the two of you had said something six months ago.”